Coming back to earth (literally and figuratively) from a whirlwind couple of weeks that included launching our first Student Leadership Summit and another fantastic conference experience at NASPA Orlando, I’ve been reflecting on the number of times I’ve said two small words that are simply better together.
Rather than muse about gratitude and the importance of sharing it freely and often (not that you shouldn’t, because you really, really should), my default thought process revolves around thinking of all the times someone helped me do something, gave me an idea to make something better or took on work that I couldn’t do … and feeling guilty about it.
I hate not feeling good enough. I despise not feeling smart enough. I spend too much time not feeling … enough.
Each time someone offered a suggestion, I beat myself up for not thinking of it first. “Why didn’t I think of that? That’s so simple. They’re a much better professional than I am.”
Asking presentation partners or colleagues to take on large(r) parts of a task felt belittling, not liberating. “Why can’t I just do that? If I managed my time better I could have gotten it done. Why am I burdening them with extra work? I bet they think less of me now because I can’t get things done.”
If I had a friend who talked to me like I talked to myself these past couple of weeks, they would not be sharing my ice cream. (Trust me, sharing ice cream with me is an honour. I like ice cream. A lot). So what gives? How do I reframe? How will I give myself permission to be enough?
The only thing running through my head as I mulled over the question this morning was this:
I may not feel smart when I forget something that someone else remembers, or overlook a detail that someone else points out, but, I am smarter, and stronger, for not going it alone. I would rather be vulnerable and achieve more together than brave but limited alone.
What about you? How do you feel ‘enough’? Leave me a comment or tweet me to talk about this more.